Today is my 34th Birthday … and life has to change. It has to change in many ways. It’s going to be a struggle. It’s going to hurt. It’s going to be a slow journey. But it has to change and change NOW. Onwards and Upwards …
“To put off doing something, especially out of habitual carelessness or laziness.” The Free Dictionary I am a great procrastinator .. why bother doing something now if you can put it off for another day? But this attitude is starting to really grate on me. Why can I never bother myself to do anything? It’s not like I HAVE to watch TV constantly or spend hours scrolling through millions of websites on Stumbleupon .. but I really do have to tidy the flat, do some washing and finish unpacking the stuf I got from my storage unit earlier in the week. And on top of all this .. when did I last write a post for this blog? Last year. A full 3 months a go .. and I have done some great stuff since then that deserved a post ..! So today I am hoping that i will get a wriggle on and get some stuff done .. I will take some pictures before I get started and if I am brave enough, one day, may post them here to show you all just how bad I can let this place get!
I hope that you all had a great Christmas yesterday? I am currently down in Devon at my parents and we had a lovely quiet day with just the 4 of us and my gran who lives with my parents now. The pile of presents was a lot smaller this year due to a few cut backs and the fact that most of the family now give out money (sounds boring but really, it’s much better than getting tonnes of expensive and useless things). Because it’s christmas, I guess my list of wants is a little lower than usual – I got everything I asked for (except the Apple TV as my parents decided they would give me the cash in case they bought the wrong thing .. so I’m buying that this week) and we had an amazing dinner yesterday courtesy of my mum. So this Wednesday, I am going to want for things for other people. Homecoming: I want the British troops to come home soon .. I’m not getting into the politics here, but as an ex-army brat, my instincts scream for them to all come home, as soon as possible and as safely as possible. … I need to read more …
I’m 33 and I still feel like I need to get permission (or at least validation) for the things I do .. and it’s ruining my life. That sounds everso dramatic but it is. I struggle to do something or decide upon things without talking to someone to get their ‘OK’ to go ahead with it. Everything from clothes I want to buy through to men I want to date and everything in between. Poor is the man whose pleasures depend on the permission of another. Madonna I can’t really put a finger on it.. why I do it or why I stop myself from doing things if I deem them to be naughty or something that other people wouldn’t expect of me; why do I feel the need to be so predictable all the time? Amy over at Roots of She wrote about this back in May and her post struck a chord with me. She says .. “What if you just gave yourself the permission to truly honor your own feelings? What would shift?”. I can honestly say that most of the things I find myself doing (or not as the case may be) would definitely not cause … I need to read more …
St. Andrew’s Day is the feast day of Saint Andrew. It is celebrated on November 30 in Scotland. Saint Andrew is the patron saint of Scotland, and St. Andrew’s Day is Scotland’s official national day. In 2006, the Scottish Parliament designated St Andrew’s Day as an official bank holiday. Wikipedia So the end of the 1st working week of my new start and I feel that I am really doing well! I have kept up on the jobs around the flat, been eating the prepared food and therefore the diet (more or less!) and seem to have so much more money in my wallet, which is brilliant. My new iPhone is the new love of my life and I think it’s helping me to keep positive and stay on track with things. This weekend is all about getting ready for Christmas. Previously (since moving out on my own) I havent really done anything as I end up going home for the important days, but this year I am getting my small tree out and will display my cards with pride .. all in an attempt to try and make this place feel like home a little more than a place where I stay most nights. This also … I need to read more …
So getting back into blogging means I have an outlet for my ‘I WANT’ moments in the form of Wednesday Wants. So let’s crack on .. this week, I have been mostly wanting … Food .. mainly Chocolate Popcorn and Percy Pigs. Being back on the Slimming World bandwagon means I am really trying to be good .. but these are 2 of my favourites and hard to resist. On the plus side, I have been a lot more organised with my meal planning and preparation thanks to my mum so money saved, diet going well and motivation getting better. Heat .. It’s really very cold here in Hampshire at the moment and I haven’t really got my head into the whole ‘need to take a scarf everywhere I go’ thing. Also my flat is crap at keeping in the heat so I need to get more jumpers! Better Sleep … I’m sleeping enough (I think) but I don’t think that it’s particularly good quality at the moment. I am definitely a 7-8 hour person and can’t survive on too many nights of less than that. So that’s it for this week .. not fussy but I am sure … I need to read more …
After my last post about new starts, I wasn’t sure how to follow it up, other than jumping right back into things .. and somehow that just felt wrong. Then I caught up on some RSS reading and came across Katlyn’s post over at The Dreamy Meadow and thought it was such a great idea that I decided to take on her challenge and do the same. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Let’s pretend that we’ve never been in contact before. You’ve never visited this blog before. You’ve never heard my name before. So who am I? What is this blog all about & why do I want to have my voice be heard? The questions above are good .. and they are similar to many I have been asking myself a lot lately. Why am I like I am; why do I do the things I do; what has made me who I am today and so on. The answers are coming slowly and I am starting to learn a lot about myself, which is proving interesting. I have worked out that I am better at keeping on top of things if they are in a good place to begin with, that I am more organised when … I need to read more …
I seem to have new starts all the time .. start off with great intentions and plans that never seem to last very long, and it frustrates me that I cannot seem to keep these going. I am starting on a new start .. if that makes sense? I want to be better organised in so many areas of my life and I know that most link into each other (i.e. better organised at planning meals means my finances will be in a better shape, thus being more organised in that too). So … This last week has been a bit of a preparation week to get me on the right track. My flat has been cleaned thoroughly and decluttering and organising has been taking place (although there is still some way to go), meals have been planned and shopping done around that (and I was amazed at how much money I saved!) and Slimming World has been rejoined and bus routes to work planned. I have said this numerous times and I wouldn’t hold it against anyone for doubting me or for saying “here she goes again …” but I am really hoping that this is the time that I will make great … I need to read more …
The definition of an anti-climax can either be “a disappointing decline after a previous rise” or “a sudden change from a serious subject to one that is disappointing or ludicrous”. For me at the moment, it is probably a mix of both. Working in the events industry means that, by its very nature, there are peaks and troughs of busy and quiet periods, but they can be really quite hard to deal with occasionally. Going from dealing with a hundred emails and calls a day and sometimes working 12 hours to having very little to do can seem strange and can sometime be a little frustrating. Having said that, there is normally another team gearing up for an event that could do with some help and this is what you tend to find yourself doing until the next project comes along. The last few months, life has been aiming towards the end of June and a large project I was working on. Hours were long (but productive – I never mind working late when you actually feel like you are achieving things) and the rest of life was put on hold to a certain extent, including my writing of blog … I need to read more …
… Makes the heart grow fonder? So you will have noticed that I haven’t really been posting much of late .. and I apologise. Not only for the lack of scintillating posts from me but also for the foresight to do something about my absence, like pre-write posts and get then scheduled in. Don’t get me wrong, I did plan to do this, but in the end, the project I was working on at work took over completely and I didn’t have time to breathe, let alone blog! So .. I have yet again missed blogging about many things that I had ear marked to do .. Wimbledon, Henley Regatta, Summer Solstice, Fathers Day, My Trip to Amsterdam .. but most of them will happen again at some point in the next year and so I will save the post ideas for then!. My Amsterdam trip was for the aforementioned large project – it meant that I didn’t get to see much of Amsterdam, which is a shame, but I did have a good time (which can’t always be said for onsites!). The plus thing is that now that I am back and am slowly getting my head back into things, I … I need to read more …
